Jaundis

Tentative 50 Patrons Celebration!

Oh, shoot, I hit 50! Didn't even realize it until someone commented. Thanks for that, by the way!

Ok, so technically, I'm not actually at 50 patrons. Patreon is dumb and keeps counting people that pledge support even after they've cancelled their subscription, so I'm probably actually at around 45-ish patrons, but... that's still close enough that I'll probably hit 50 for real next month! So yaaaaay!

Thanks to all of you, whether you've been here since the beginning or yo...

Thistle's C-List Meal Ticket

“A-And you’re SURE this will work?” Harry asked for the millionth time, sweat trickling down his neck.

Thistle rolled her eyes and leaned against the alley wall. “Yeah, dumbass, it’ll work so long as the pic you got is right. Give it here.”

The sweaty man shakily pulled a photo from his jacket pocket and handed it to Thistle. She looked it over. It was a full-profile picture of a very familiar redheaded hottie laughing it up in skimpy exercise gear. Cute~. Let...

Hot Tub Tum Time (Comm)

Unbelievable. Un-be-LIEV-able! This was ridiculous! Why? Why was this happening to Molly? Whyyyyyyyy!?

The frustrated woman slammed her fork down and stared down at the remaining burger on her plate. She couldn’t eat it. She’d only had one burger before this, yet she couldn’t eat it. She was full. How? WHY? She used to be able to eat TEN of these damn things! TEN! And she’d still have room for a quart of ice cream for dessert! So WHY could she barely s...

Casual Juice Enjoyer Watches a 'Mukbang'

“It’s been great, I guess, but I should probably get going. I need to eat and post an update.”

“I still can’t believe that you pander to those people. It’s gross.”

“It beats working a night shift at a shitty gas station or being a lab rat.”

Margo scowled at Cass’ comment but didn’t bother trying to retort. She knew it wasn’t a jab at her and just a general thing, but it was still shitty to say. That damn woman could be so insensitive sometimes. Guess ...

Thoughts on monster gal content? Yes? No?

Before starting on Streaming a Feeding, I'd decided that if I was gonna do a lamia fic, I would do a LAMIA fic, not just a regular fic with a gal who happens to have snake bits. That meant doing stuffs that aren't in my usual fics that y'all might not vibe with, like the jaw unhinging, the 'move stuff from human tum to snake tube' bit, the raw meats, my not shying away from mentioning her scales, and the bit at the end with how Cass ate the turkey. But the question is... did I go too...

Streaming a Feeding

CW: This fic features a lamia in all her monster girl glory. There's no vore, but I don't shy away from making use of a lamia's snakey characteristics. If you don't like the land version of mermaids, you might not enjoy this fic too terribly much. You've been warned~

“... and, like, he said that ‘I would do’. Like, those EXACT words! Seriously, how much do you have to stick your head up your own ass to be able to say stuff like that?”<...

Our Big June Winner IS-

D.Va, from... that one game! It wasn't a very big game, so I'm not sure how many of you would even recognize the title if I put it here. I'm sure I'll remember it at some point, though... 

This spunky gamer gurl will be the feature of this month's featured fic, so make sure to Watch Over your feed at the end of the month! I haven't had an inflation in an exclusive fic yet, so I'm thinking ...

~June plans~

It's June time, which is completely different from morbin time. There will be no morbin here. Only orbin. Orbin them tums. Eyyoooooo.

I know, I know, my joke is bad and I should feel bad. Moving on-

I'm actually a bit ahead on my work this time, so I have DATES for posting stuff! Imagine that!

I'm planning on posting the first full fic of the month on the 8th. It's... a good bit different from my usual stuff, but I hope y'all still enjoy it! As a hint, it's featuring a new O...

Anya is Bad at Moral Support (Short)

This was it. This was her one and only chance. If she missed this strike, Yor’s life was over. Just remain calm… aaaaand…

*THUNK!*

“Awww! Mummy killed my new friend!”

Yor breathed out a massive sigh of relief as she watched the fly she’d speared with a fork from across the room struggle for a moment before falling limp. Yes! No fly would be landing on her specially made dinner tonight! The black-haired beauty smiled warmly at her step-d...

Weiss' Ice (Cream) Vice

Quick heads-up: This fic technically takes place in the RWBY Degenerate AU that I’ve done a number of commissions for. All you really need to know for this fic in particular is that Yang and Weiss are in a relationship in this AU. Oh, also, Weiss is 20 or 21 depending on when in the AU timeline this gets plopped.

It was official. Weiss was bored.

Classes were out for the week and Weiss was, tragically, alone. Blake had taken the opportunity to ...

A Tight Drinking Game

Tasha was excited. She and Kat had been spending a lot of time at her flat, but Kat’s flat was… well, no offense to the lovely woman living there, but it wasn’t really… lived in. She didn’t own many movies, she didn’t have any consoles, her book and board game collection was limited to a few erotic novels and a never-been-opened Twister mat, and she had more towels hanging in her bathroom than pictures on her walls.

To put it bluntly, Kat didn’t live in her flat. She slept...

A Rare Day Off (Short)

Spoiler Note: This takes place after the events of the Crimson Flower route in Fire Emblem: Three Houses. I avoided as many spoilers as possible, but if you’re at all worried about that kinda thing, consider skipping this short for now.

For the first time in a while, it was a peaceful and quiet day. Bright sunlight was beating down on Byleth’s head as she walked through the palace garden. The war was over. Those that slither in the dark were still lurking, ...

An Eventful Business Trip (pt. 2)

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

Kerry was so fucking fucked. Unbelievably fucked. Immeasurably fucked. It was over. It was all over.

The sweaty brunette clutched the satin sheets of the bed to her bare chest as she stared miserably up at the ceiling above her. The only noises in the dim room were soft snoring and the occasional heavy belch coming from right next to Kerry. As adorable and heavenly as those sounds were, they were a constant reminder ...

Gonna be a bit late... again. But for good reason!

Ok, I know I said new stary yesterday or today, but it's gonna be till tomorrow instead. There's a good reason, though!

I've been working on the Tasha fic and it was getting pretty long, so I was thinking about taking some liberties and doing some jump-cut sorta dealies like I do a bunch, but it seemed like a super shame since I love the idea and what's been happening in it so much.

Then my brain- my stupid, stupid brain - had the idea that 'oh, hey, you should use this f...

Mid-Month update time!

It seems to be a pattern that I'm fairly inactive at the start of the month and then I get my chiz together starting around the middle. I should try to fix that. In the meantime, though...

I'll have a new fic out for y'all either tomorrow or the day after! After that one, there'll be one more full fic before the exclusive at the month, just like usual. 

The fic tomorrow/overmorrow will very likely be a Tasha solo experience, but in the off chance I can't manage to get that fi...

It's a Date~

“Hello! Have you been waiting long?”

Ganyu smiled over at Keqing as she approached the table. “I’ve only just arrived myself, so don’t worry.”

Keqing breathed a small sigh of relief as she sank into the seat across from Ganyu. “I was worried that I may have driven you off with my lateness but it seems like we both had our work keep us late.”

“So it does. I was surprised to find that I was the first here after arriving half an hour late.”

Keqing chuc...

The May winner is...

The haughty and oh-so responsible Weiss Schnee gets an exclusive fic in honor of her birth month! I can already pretty much promise you that this one will be a bloat fic, so look forward to some sloshy tum fun at the end of the month~.

In second place, we have... a tie? Well, damn. Both Yor from the recently beloved Spy X Family and the Pyra/Mythra power duo from Xenoblade 2 will be getting sho...

~Plans for May~

Heyo, lovelies! It's time to clue you all in on my plans for the month~

First off, I completely blanked on the short fic for last month. Totally my bad! Edelgard and Byleth will be getting their short fic sometime this month along with whoever ends up in second on this month's poll.

I'm also trying a new strategy: advertisement and diversification. This doesn't really mean anything to you guys at all, actually. I'm just gonna be trying a bit more actively to brin...

Fuckin' Bet

“...And what the fuck do you know, Rock? You think you know me? You don’t know shit!”

The shithead Japanese man just sighed as he knocked back a shot of whiskey. “It’s not about knowing you, Revy. It’s about knowing basic human biology. A person - ANY person - can’t drink fifteen pints of alcohol without dying.”

Revy narrowed her eyes. “Fuckin’ bet, dickfuck.”

“No!” Rock insisted. “Not even someone who was seven feet tall and several hund...

Mindy's Collab Practice

Ok, so, Mindy had a problem. A pretty big problem. Gigantic, really.

Mindy was an artist, first and foremost. That was her jam. Her deal. Her bread and butter. She made a living off of her art. Her tasty, tasty swollen lady art. She loved it. It was great.

Then she’d started being a swollen lady. That was great too. She’d drink a whole bunch, get all big and sloshy, then have some fun. She’d even tried eating a few times as well. She didn’t love it, but it’d sti...

~ New ~ Fic ~ Today or Tomorrow ~

Just keeping y'all in the loop. I've got a lovely little fic in the works to post either today or tomorrow (depending on when I get the time to finish it). 

I don't have the means to give a sneak peek of it right now, but I think I'll come back and add one in once I do. In the meantime, I'll just say that a kinky artist OC of mine is getting a playdate~.

Well, either it's that or my brain will randomly decide to work on the Ganyu x Keqing fic that I've been brainstorming. But...

How to Make a Chocolate Egg

Cris was scared. Not for her life or anything, of course - she just had a general sense of anxiety. It was Easter, after all. Her favorite dom gal was weird enough the rest of the year, but she always seemed to get extra worked up around Easter for some reason. It didn’t help that Cris had been out of town for work for the last week, so Jamie was probably pent up. And so, as Jamie pulled into their driveway, she was afraid. Not for her life, but for her stomach - and her pelvis soon after.<...

One Tantalizing Teatime

“...And I’m telling you, he’s the best. Always remembers our anniversary, always knows what kind of gifts I want without asking me, listens when I’m feeling bitchy, and knows all my spots~.  Seriously, I definitely picked the right brother. Sorry, Peachy.”

Princess Peach sighed despondently as she ran a finger along the rim of her teacup. “I might have argued about that a few years ago, but… recently, Mario seems to care more about one-upping that st...

The April Winner is...

Revy from Black Lagoon! It's another show that I haven't watched, so I guess it's time to make some more popcorn.

In second place, Edelguard + Byleth finally manage to claim a fic! Sure, it's just a short fic, but it's finally their time to shine. On that note, I guess it's time to watch a compilation of all the cutscenes related to those two since I've never played a Fire Emblem game ever... A...

~ It's ~ Poll ~ Time ~ (April)

Ladies, germs, both, and neither, it's time to pick which lovely lady/ladies are gonna end up with too much junk in their front!

A few older suggestions have been given a second chance at victory to fill in the ranks. It feels way better to do this than to toss in a few of my own picks (not that my suggestions ever won, heh).

A reminder that Sphinxes should comment down below what they want their second vote to go to. Or, if you're one of the couple of friendly peeps who didn't su...

Neo's Most Excellent Prank (Short)

Quick heads-up: This short is based on the degen RWBY AU that I’ve written a good few fics for at this point. As such, all the gals are older and they've 'matured' in a lot of ways. Oh, but Neo herself looks pretty much the same. Just thought I'd let you know~.

Well, well, well, what do we have here? If it wasn’t little red, waltzing around without a care in the world. Neo sat up on the roof she was reclining on to watch her favorite little goody-two-shoes wobble her way ac...

April General Update thing

Heyoooo! It's ya girl, Jaundis, back at it again with the cringe intro!

After careful consideration and review, it probably is still best to do updates here on Patreon than to use Twitter, even if these will mix in with the actual stories since everything counts as text on this site. I'll try and give y'all an update once or twice a month depending on what needs saying.

The format of story-story-story-exclusive is working well for my mental and work lives, so I'll likely stick wit...

Rias Rounds Out

NOTE: Every character here is 18+. Rias and Akeno are potentially already 18 from the very start of the show and I’m deliberately having this take place later on in their third year so that they’re assuredly 18 or maybe even 19. So yes, everyone is, at minimum, 18.

The scent of tea surrounded Rias. This was nice. It wasn’t often that she got to enjoy the peace and quiet of the night- especially for the last year. Ever since she had raised her beloved Issei as a de...