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Bitter Karella
Bitter Karella

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Midnight Pals: Rapture

Judith Sonnet: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of psych ward blues
Sonnet: it's about what if god was an insane monster who hates his creation
Dean Koontz: nuh uh that's not true, god is nice
Sonnet:
Poe: dean, let her finish

Sonnet: it's a beautiful day, birds chirping, sun shining
Sonnet: lovers are strolling in the park
Sonnet: telling each other how much they love each other
Sonnet: in fact, things are so pleasant that it would be ironic if something BAD suddenly happened
King: oh no
Barker: oh yes

Sonnet: so in the midst of this tranquil scene
Sonnet: young Cuthbert Gooch was enjoying an ice cream cone
Sonnet: just a smudge of ice cream smeared on his face like the adorable moppet he was
Sonnet: feeding a squirrel
Sonnet: and chuckling to himself as he thought about how much he enjoyed being alive
Sonnet: "i love being alive and breathing and respirating," he thought
Sonnet: "nothing beats this"

Sonnet: and then
Sonnet: all of a sudden his chest exploded and his soul blew right out of his body
Sonnet: viscera everywhere
Sonnet: so much viscera
Sonnet: all over the floor
Sonnet: and the cashier is all "sir you can't explode here, this is a wendys"

Dean Koontz: noooo that's not how it goes!
Barker: "Cuthbert Gooch?"
Koontz: your soul passes through you peacefully!
Koontz: like a ghost!
Barker: "Cuthbert Gooch?"
Sonnet: what? its a normal name
Sonnet: all my characters have normal names

Sonnet: all over the world, people are exploding
Sonnet: cuz its the rapture
Sonnet: and the thing is there's no heaven or hell
Sonnet: we all go to the same place afterwards
Sonnet: and boy does it suck

Sonnet: just imagine being tortured for all eternity
Sonnet: just constantly flayed and disemboweled and disembrained and split and railed and chopped
Barker: yeah sounds real bad
Barker: haha i'm kidding that would rule
Sonnet: maybe in theory
Sonnet: but in real life
Barker: no no i could take it
Barker: i'm built different

Sonnet: these survivors in a psych ward are trying to find out what happened
Sonnet: an angel contacts them via the computer
Sonnet: the angel's all "hey real sorry about all this"
Sonnet: "kind of a little problem in heaven, see"
Sonnet: "god's gone just a little bit mad"
Sonnet: "he's like a mad god now"
Koontz: maybe god should be in a psych ward
King: wow from the mouths of babes

Koontz: nooo! that's not how it happens!
Koontz: steve tell her that's not how it happens
King: dean do you remember when i told my revival story
Koontz: nooooo
Koontz: i didn't like that one :(
Poe: can you all please stop upsetting dean?
Poe: we're going to have so much trouble getting him to sleep tonight

Comments

“Cuthbert Gooch” Pretty, pretty sure King wouldn’t have chosen that PARTICULAR last name, BK

T. Ledoux


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