Video script

On my last post here, I described a video idea I had and asked if you thought it would be worthwhile. Some of you came up with legitimate concerns that it was very similar to my "If God Were A Car" video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qahB7mYhLxs). I hadn't thought of that. Sometimes ideas reformulate and I don't realize it's stuff I already covered (the car video was 5 years ago). The video approaches a different aspect of religion, but it uses the same methodology as the real estate video, which leaves me uncertain as to whether I should do this one.

The car video was all about standards for justifying belief in God's existence, while the real estate video concerns itself not with God, but with the believer. It's more about the believer's place in heaven, our standards of acceptance, and conflicts of interest. Another difference is that there are two separate offers proposed in the real estate video, both absurd and juxtaposed to reflect that absurdity, yet the religious absurdity is the one that's accepted, even though it's the same type of offer.

Because I'm undecided about how to move forward, I'm going to do something I haven't done before; I'm posting the script. You've proven to be immensely helpful, so I figure it couldn't hurt to put it all out there and get your opinion as to whether or not it's still too similar. If this one doesn't work out too, that's okay. I've got yet another idea and I'm sure I've never covered it before. Before we get into that, however, here's the script:

*Customer walks into a "Century 1" Real Estate office*

Customer - Excuse me, I’m looking to buy a house here in Paradise county.

Realtor - You’re in luck! There is one house for sale in Paradise county.

Customer - Only one house? But millions of people live here.

Realtor - True, but there’s only one house for sale. Trust me.

Customer - Oooooookay. What’s this one house like?

Realtor - It’s a stunning mansion with 12 bedrooms, 15 bathrooms, 4 car garage, swimming pool, jacuzzi, massive kitchen...

Customer - Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on there. I can’t afford all that.

Realtor - Oh, sorry. What’s your price range?

Customer - 200,000 dollars tops.

Realtor - Oh that’s perfect. The mansion is 175,000 dollars.

Customer - Only 175? That sounds too good to be true. A property like that should be worth millions of dollars.

Realtor - Well it’s not. The owner priced it at 175.

Customer - Okay. I’d like to go take a look at it.

Realtor - Very good. Let me just get all the paperwork together and we’ll put in your offer for 175,000.

Customer - No, wait a minute. I’m not making an offer right now. I want to look at it first.

Realtor - What? Why?

Customer - What do you mean why? First I want to see if I’ll actually like it.

Realtor - Oh, no need. Anyone who purchases this house will like it.

Customer - How could you possibly know that?

Realtor - Just look at the ad. The owner himself said “Anyone who purchases this house will like it.” I’ll get that paperwork drawn up for you.

Customer - Wait a minute. I’m not just going to take the owner’s word for it. Of course they’re going to say I’ll like the house. Why can’t I just look at it for myself?

Realtor - You’re not very trusting are you?

Customer - It’s not just that. I’d have to have inspections done.

Realtor - Inspections?

Customer - Yeah. Termites, electrical, plumbing, a/c, roof leaks...

Realtor - *laughs* That’s totally unnecessary.

Customer - Why?

Realtor - Because the owner says the house is in perfect condition. Just sign on the dotted line there.

Customer - I’m not signing that.

Realtor - Okay. Have a nice day, sir. Please don’t come back unless you’re serious about actually purchasing a home. I don’t appreciate you wasting my time.

Customer - But I am serious. My job just transferred me to Paradise County and I really need a place. I tell you what, I’ll check this place out on my own and if I’m interested, I’ll come back.

Realtor - Sorry. No can do. Once you walk out that door, the offer is off the table and you won’t be able to purchase the house.

Customer - Let me get this straight. You want me to pay 175,000 dollars of my hard earned money for a house that I’m not allowed to inspect, or even look at, and I’m supposed to just trust the word of the person selling the house that not only is it in perfect condition, but that I’ll actually like the place. And to top it off, if I leave without agreeing to buy the house, then the offer is off the table.

Realtor - Uh yeah that about sums it up.

Customer - Sorry, but I worked had to save my money and I plan on living in my next house for at least the next 10 years. I’m not going to just blindly trust the person trying to sell me this supposed house that I’m not even allowed to look at. Good day, sir.

*Customer walks out and says “psh”. Preacher accosts him.*

Preacher - Excuse me, sir. Have you heard about our religion?

Customer - What about it?

Preacher - Well, if you accept the tenets of our religion, and try to live by them, then after you die, you will live on in heaven.

Customer - Heaven?

Preacher - It’s a place where you could spend all of eternity.

Customer - Really? That’s a long time.

Preacher - Yep.

Customer - What’s heaven like?

Preacher - It’s the greatest place you could ever be. You’ll be really, really happy there.

Customer - Can I see it?

Preacher - Not until after you die. And if you don’t accept the offer before you die, then the offer is off the table.

Customer - How do you know heaven is so great?

Preacher - Says so in this holy book written by the people who founded our religion.

Customer - How can you trust them?

Preacher - Because they were inspired by God, and God is perfect in every way.

Customer - How do you know all that?

Preacher - Says so in the holy book they wrote.

Customer - So let me get this straight. If I live the rest of my life the way that book says I should, and believe the things that book says I should, then after I die, I’ll live on for all of eternity in a place of happiness, a place which I’m not allowed to inspect while I’m alive, but if I don’t accept the offer before I die, then the offer will off the table, and the only evidence I have to go on is the very same book written by the people who are presenting this offer to me?

Preacher - Uh yeah that about sums it up.

Customer - Sign me up!