PATREON EXCLUSIVE: Is There A Correlation Between A Woman Who Shows A Lot Of Skin In Public And Being Low Quality?

I think there is. and don't worry about not sounding "progressive"

Great video, I agree entirely. I use this example to argue my point: In 1996, The rape statistics in South Africa was “a woman is raped every 80 seconds”. I remember this because it was on a massive billboard posted next to an on-ramp to the highway. In 2010 I saw that the stats had changed to something like “every 45 seconds”. When women argue that the way that they dress is not for attention if men or for men but for themselves, that the way they dress has no bearing on risk to themselves, or that rape has nothing to do with looks and it’s all just a power thing, ask with these rape statistics in preface; “If you were going out for a night on the town in South Africa, would the knowledge of those stats influence what you would wear?” If they say no, it’s either devolved to argument rather than discussion and she’s trying to win no matter how objectively wrong she knows she is or, simply squirming in cognitive dissonance or, she just hasn’t grasped just how impactful the way she dresses can affect attention. Women that go from non blonde, to blonde hair and then back again can attest to the difference in attention. A woman in South Africa would be weary of catching too much attention knowing that rape is a horrifically common thing. The women in SA do not necessarily do take caution because it’s so normalised there, they don’t realise it.

Craig

Clothes are supposed to send a message. Women know what message showing a lot of skin sends and how people are gonna perceive them. High quality women don't like to be hit on by strangers, it's as simple as that.

Eduard Dubrovsky

Sounds like her ex was a dick :( fashion is an expression of yourself, and no partner should ask you to change yourself, since they can find anyone else. I hope she has boundaries now !

Oliver

Sure. From my perspective the difference is emotionally wanting validation so that you feel better about yourself OR acting to increase people's perception of you for practical reasons. One is filling your own lack of self esteem and the other is making the most of a social advantage.

Steven

Can you elaborate on the distinction you’re making between seeking validation vs. wanting to be perceived more positively?

That's a really interesting point! I would say that in the case you layed out the man isn't even seeking validation. He chooses to wear good clothes because of the positive perception. I feel like on the female side a woman could do the same thing, if showing some skin is done not for validation but because it presents as more attractive/feminine. I believe in both cases it comes down to degree and intent.

Steven

I think the principle regarding external validation is generally accurate. However, how far do we apply this principle? For example, take a guy with high self esteem who used to have no regard for what he wore in public because he didn’t want to rely on that external validation. Now that guy wears nicer clothing because he understands that it positively influences how people perceive him in public, which grants him opportunities he wouldn’t have had otherwise. Does succumbing to that desire to be perceived more positively really indicate a loss of self esteem? At the end of the day, some level of validation seeking is required to function in society. Perhaps the amount required decreases as society’s priorities become less superficial. But ultimately, a large part of seeking external validation is a cynical yet necessary realization that society often does have shallow priorities that to some extent need catering.

I too live in Florida so I can attest to Jen's statements, this is a common occurrence in Tampa for sure.

Kevin Pereira

btw my girlfriend used to cover up in public because her previous boyfriend told her to do that maybe out of insecurity. but she likes looking good showing a bit of skin and I like that too.

Andy

I used to think more this way but maybe showing skin is also correlated with being feminine, sexual and fun, caring about appearance, body shape, fitness. Do I really want a woman who is more interested in a PhD? As for the prize maybe that’s more touch, sex, relationship for some guys and not just visual...

Andy

I live in Florida where women often use the heat to rationalize very little clothing. But, it is so obvious it is for validation. For example, there are heavier women who have fairly decent legs so they will wear the shortest, skimpiest, shorts possible even though hips up they are very large. To be fair, sometimes you see women with little on because they are going to or coming from the beach which is about 10-15 minutes away... but it is usually easy to tell who is having a beach day and just stopping in our town for lunch versus someone wearing a skimpy outfit just because she needs eyes on her to feel confident.

Sometimes I wonder if God forgot to put fear in Alex's heart. Also agree, you explained each point perfectly.

Use less clothes for rapists is like to keep open your home windows for burglars. You have your rights but you need to be aware of dangerous people and that is correlated to be aware of reality.