RJ Ramblings

Hey everybody! Last Ramblings of the year (because I won't be home next Monday), and I'm in a pretty bad mood, so it might be a rough one!

Yesterday, I had a pretty big fight with my roommate/landlord. We've been living with her for like 9 years now. At first, it was like, she's a very good friend and trying to help us out and we were in a rough spot. I didn't pay rent at all at first, because I wasn't working. I had had a bit of a mental breakdown and did not feel like I could go back to working a full-time job. So she offered to let me live with her, but I'd do all the housework - cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, yardwork, house repairs - everything. And I did. I did everything I possibly could for her for years. I still do. 

Recently though, with me making money from the game, she has been abusing that a bit. Now, not only am I still doing everything, I'm also helping out with the bills and buying the groceries.

Yesterday, she was supposed to give me money for groceries, but she didn't have any, because she had bought Christmas presents for everybody. So now this puts me in a position where I'm either going to pay for everything, or cook food in our shared kitchen and not let her have any (which I don't think I could do). It's really frustrating. I feel like I'm being taken advantage of. She helped me out for a long time, but I feel like I repaid that through labor. When she is at home, she does nothing aside from sitting in front of the television. 

So, I was pretty stressed out yesterday. I was looking into houses last night, again. We're going to move out soon, but I haven't decided when or where. Probably next year after I pay taxes. Probably somewhere in the same area, because I want to be around to help my mom, who is not doing too great. And honestly, I'll probably still help my roommate out with stuff too, because she's also not doing great, and despite everything, I still love and care about her. 

I'm just tired of being here, stuck in this spot and unable to leave. It's so hard, either because of money, or obligations, or just caring about other people.

Other than all of this, I've been about the same. Playing Pokemon, watching bad movies, and I started playing The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask on 3DS, as it's one of the few Zelda games I never finished. 

I hope you are all doing well. I know this was kind of a venting session, but hey, that's what these Ramblings are about sometimes. Now that I got it out of my system, hopefully I can get to work and not be stressed about it all day. 

Happy holidays to all of you. I'll be out of town from the 23rd to the 27th, but I have some fun stuff scheduled to be posted. Love you all and talk to you again next year!