Detention list part 2

'I will not go to classes sky clad'

'I am not the heir to Hogwarts'

'I will not make rude gestures with my hands'

'I will not make rude gestures with my feet'

'I will not teach others how to make rude gestures with their tounges'

'I am not a rude gesture'

'I am not a rude jester'

'I will stop shouting 'gay' for every hour that Draco Malfoy exists'

'I will not 'Tarzan' my way through the hallways'

'It is not opposite day'

'Tovay is not misspelt day'

'I will not try to bribe Professor McGonagall with milk, balls of strings or any other cat related items'

'Professor Snape has a hook nose, not a nose that can be used as a hook'

'The Weasley twins are not my servants, nor am I their pranking god'

'I am not a pranking god'

'I will stop referring to Professor Snape as 'virgin for life'

'I will stop saying 'I'm going to see some pussy' every time I go to Professor McGonagall's class'

'My kingdom is not everything the light touches'

'I will not try and turn every other male in school into a female so my girlfriend doesn't get tempted'

'Just because Headmaster Dumbledore dresses ridiculous, doesn't mean I can'

'I am not vengeance, nor am I the night'

'I will not use the armours on the third floor so I can joust'

'I will not skip a day of school and dedicate it to the god of mischief'

'I am not the long lost heir or distant grandson of Loki'

'I will not make a fifth house called Loki'

'I will not put slithery on the Slytherin banner, annoying on the Gryffindor banner, emotional on the Hufflepuff banner or bitchy on the Ravenclaw banner'

'I will not place best on my house banner'

'I will not rally students so the house names can change from Gryffindor to Potterdor, Slytherin to Potterin, Ravenclaw to Potterclaw or Hufflepuff to Potterpuffs'

'I will stop doing so many lines'

'Not doing lines means not getting in trouble not refusing to do lines'

'I will stop taking the words 'you can't' as a challenge'

'I will not flirt with everything that moves'

'I will not flirt with everything that doesn't move'

'I will not attempt to breed a liger'

'My girlfriend is not permitted to rule Hogwarts in my steed, nor am I'

'I will stop trying to corrupt my girlfriend'

'I will not blame my naughty behaviour on the author of this story'

'I will stop jumping out and surprising people while shouting 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE MOTHER FUCKERS!''

'I will stop jumping out and surprising people while shouting 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE BITCH!''

'I will stop jumping out and surprising people while shouting 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE!''

'I will stop jumping out and surprising people while shouting 'CONSTANT VIGILANCE MOTHER FUCKER, DO YOU HAVE IT?!''

'I am not allowed to have a dragon for a pet'

'I am not allowed to have a dragon for a friend'

'I will not beat Ron Weasley in chess by tossing the board and destroying his pieces with a bat'

'I will not pay the twins to Polyjuice themselves as Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy and have them force Draco Malfoy to sit down and listen to them talk for an hour about how I 'conquered' his mother and how she is now leaving his father for me'

'I did not conquer Draco Malfoy's mother and I will stop adding 'yet' to that sentence'

'I did not conquer anybody's mother'

'I will stop having staring contests with owls'

'Growing Marijuana is not an extra credit assignment'

'It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously'

'It is a bad idea to tell Professor McGonagall she takes herself too seriously'

'I will stop setting Professor McGonagall on dates with cats'

'Giving Daphne Greengrass some green grass was not funny the first time, nor was it the four hundredth and fifth'

'I will not paint Lavender Brown lavender, nor will I paint her brown'

My girlfriend is not my secretary'

'I will not snog my girlfriend on Professor Snape's desk'

'I will not snog my girlfriend on Professor McGonagall's desk'

'I will not snog my girlfriend on the Headmaster's desk'

'I am not a desk'

'I will not illegally park my broom'

'Hagrid's beard is not an acceptable 'hide and seek' hiding spot, nor is the headmaster's beard'

'I will stop yelling 'come at me bro' unless I want an actual brother to physically come closer'

'I will stop yelling 'that is mahogany' every time Hermione Granger drops a book on the desk'

'It is pronounced 'milk' not 'miluk''

'When Professor McGonagall says she shouldn't hear bad language 'plug your ears' is not an acceptable response'

'I will stop standing up and shouting 'I volunteer as tribute' every time Professor Snape asks a question'

'I will not try to disprove 'Yolo'

'Spiky hair does not mean 'hair boner'

'The headmaster's beard is not compensating for something'

'Professor Snape is not creepy'

'Hermione Granger is not needy'

'I will not 'ship' people by forcing them to sit in boats'

'I am not a dalek'

'I will stop trying to make a dalek'

'I am not a time lord'

'I am not a Doctor, nor am I THE Doctor'

'It doesn't matter if I have a Tardis, I must still be on time for lessons'

'Ronald Weasley is not after my soul, nor will I offer him Hermione Granger's soul in exchange for him leaving me alone'

'It doesn't matter how impressive it is, sixty swear words in a minute is not a good achievement'

'I cannot copyright brilliance'

'My peinus does not have a stun setting nor does it have a kill mode'

'I am not the answer'

'I will stop saying 'that's what she said''

'I will stop having skillet play throughout the whole school every time I am depressed'