Made some adjustments to chapter 1
Added 2021-07-28 21:45:59 +0000 UTCPlease tell me if this feels better or not.
I want to get into chapter 2 now, but I want this to be as good as possible.
Comments
The story looks good, but unless the gods will face repercussions for their action, the MC can just roll over and die again - they will just screw her again regardless of her actions. Looks like other gods are much more powerful then elven goddess - they can basically do anything to elves and she can't stop them. There is no balance of power. The chapter is ok, if you want to follow up on this big Chekhov gun :)
Pltergeist
2021-07-29 08:24:18 +0000 UTCWell, now I hope that some form of (more) divine judgment fall upon those as... gods. Just for moral satisfaction.
Дмитрий Лагода
2021-07-29 04:18:01 +0000 UTC
