Day dreamin'

Hello beautiful patrons,

I wanted to share with you some of the dreams I've been having. I've been thinking a lot about all of the beautiful experiences & creations that having you as my patrons could enable. So far, I am amazed at all of the support, and so super grateful at all of the beautiful money you have let flow into my life. I daydream a LOT! Here is what has been on my mind;

First of all, I really feel called to share my experiences of what it's been like being labelled with a mental health disorder, why I didn't believe it when they said I'd have it for life, and why I decided to find alternative methods of healing and go on a massive journey to see if my body could in fact heal itself, and what I discovered along the way could potentially half the number of people being diagnosed with mental health conditions. I want to make a new YouTube playlist sharing the educational side and then together with a filmmaker and editor create a patron only docu-series for Patreon documenting the more personal side of my story. This is really important to me because I believe when we go through negative sh!t in our lives (and trust me, at times it could NOT have got any worse) there has to be a reason why we went through it, there has to be a purpose or a silver lining. For me, the silver lining would be to make public, everything I have learned, so that others after me dealing with the same pain might have an easier ride. To do a good job of this, I would need to pay the filmmaker/editor and so that's where your money would be going. (some of last months earnings paid back the filmmaker and editor who created the patreon trailer) 

I am thinking of making this docu a $5/10 tier so that it's accessible to as many people as possible, and of course, anyone on a tier above, would have access to it as well (if it's of interest to you of course).

Another dream, is that I've always wanted to learn to sing! I am friends with many amazing musicians and music producers and I would love to create an album...mostly because I cannot stop making music videos in my head and I would love to bring them to reality! 

A few years ago when I was unwell and waiting for a doctor to get in touch, I decided to entertain myself by making music videos. Once I started I couldn't stop! I literally spent three days making videos where I would improvise dances to my favourite songs, or I would dress up as Julia Roberts and recreate a scene from the movie Pretty Woman and on and on it went until I had hours and hours of footage. It quite literally kept me alive. I showed this footage to an artist friend of mine and he asked me to record myself talking, he looped my words over one of the videos and it took on a completely different life. Another friend of mine who is now a big cinematographer for Hollywood films told me that I had to turn the content into a film. This would be a feature film with a really crazy twist and an alternate reality I want to call 3 days. 

Have you ever heard the phrase "If I weren't afraid I would..." (and then you fill in the blank) ? If I weren't afraid I would turn three days into a movie, make an album, share my struggle with bipolar and depression, amongst many other dreams. 

Your support as my patrons is making these dreams seem closer and closer to coming true. All i can say is THANK YOU.

I want you to enjoy the content I make here on Patreon, I want to hear your voice, your feedback, your thoughts, so I can keep making bolder and braver content. The Authenticity Challenge is quietly working its magic and I am becoming more accepting of myself, and the more accepting I become the more free I will be, And that is ultimately where I want us all to to be; FREE.

More vlogs coming every week (at least 3)...do let me know if that was the weirdest video so far on the AC or if you're ready for things to get even more weirdly personal!!!

Suze :-)