The Chick Before The Egg Ch. 11 and Epilogue

Ch. 9

The entire walk over was accompanied by no end of grumbling and cursing under my breath. In a desperate attempt to keep myself from falling apart, I was trying my best to reach for anger. And I could do that fairly easily; unfortunately, my body had decided that wasn’t the only emotion it would be surfacing. Perhaps it was the sea of new hormones flooding my body, but the whole way there I was blinking back tears and little sobs between ill-fated attempts to clench my jaw and twist my lips into a scowl. Some weird, lingering bit of masculine pride was telling me that I shouldn’t cry, but stoicism was apparently no longer something I had in my arsenal in situations like this.

And fuck it, I was sad, like really, really sad. Hurt, too; it wasn’t that I had no idea this was coming, I’d known from the get-go that this would be a possibility, but part of me hadn’t wanted to believe it. Even as I’d thrown myself deeper and deeper into femininity, part of me had hoped deep down that I’d somehow misheard Olivia that morning. Or that I could somehow just pretend that the phone call and subsequent conversation had never happened at all, and just be a girl for her. Or, rather, at the time, be a feminine guy for her. But apparently not. Realistically, I couldn’t blame Olivia for not having seen me as a girl before.

She was a lesbian, it wasn’t her fault for wanting to leave me and date women instead of what she’d literally been told was just  a feminine guy exploring his presentation. But the cheating, the cheating was fucked. It didn’t make any sense; she didn’t seem like that kind of person, but maybe that was the point. People didn’t go into relationships expecting to be cheated on. I’d held on for so long to this idea that it was fine, throwing myself into this whole femininity thing in place of actually confronting what I’d heard that morning. But it was so much easier to keep a lid on it all before things became as real as they were now. When it was more just my own funtime adventure with accidental gender identity exploration, and not me losing my girlfriend to a huge violation of trust.

Realistically, I didn’t know what the hell my plan was. I was going to show up at this party where Olivia apparently was and then what? Just yell and scream at her? That wouldn’t actually help me. At the end of the day, she’d have still cheated on me, I was really only making a fool of myself, but frankly, I didn’t care. I just needed to get these feelings out, I was pissed and I was sad and I was hurt. And I needed her to know that.

What was worse, however, was that Olivia turning out to be a shitty girlfriend was possibly the lesser of my problems. Just what the fuck was I going to do about the missing pills? I’d been wracking my brain over and over, but the only thing I could think was that I’d left them in the changing room at the store, and that store closed early on Sundays, so I couldn’t even bother checking. Thinking about the consequences of that just made me feel even worse than before. I was already in too deep; there was no going back, the concept of losing this body was revolting, sickening. The mere thought of it had me trembling. It was a complete mystery just how long it would take for Dylan to whip up another transformation spell, And until then I’d have to just be in my old body and -- I shuddered visibly, forcing myself to think about other things. Unfortunately the only other thing my brain would let me think about was this thing with Olivia.

By the time I was nearing my destination, I was so overcome with emotion I could barely think. I stomped up to the front door and, upon realizing I had no idea whose house I was standing in front of, let out a defeated sigh and pulled out my phone to text Dylan. Honestly, nothing takes the wind out of your sails like forcing an emotional moment to come to a screeching halt in order to text your best friend asking to let you into the place you were supposed to be having said emotional moment inside of. I waited a few minutes out there on the doorstep, awkwardly trying and failing to keep a handle on things as I idled. The door opened, and I was looking up at Dylan, who, upon seeing the state I was in, gave a sympathetic smile.

“Ah, fuck. Look, I’m sorry, Abigail. I’ll go get her; when you’re done, let’s go get a beer or something, get your mind off things.” He turned and marched away purposefully before I even had the chance to reply, leaving me once again awkwardly twiddling my thumbs while trying my best to not completely lose it. When the door swung open, I found myself eye to eye with Olivia. Which was weird, since we definitely weren’t usually eye to eye, but I very quickly got over that weirdness and instead felt a wave of powerful emotions overtake me. The problem, however, was that I couldn’t actually get those emotions out. Seeing her like that had me choked up to the point where I could barely force out a breath, let alone anything comprehensible. Olivia stared at me in confusion for several moments before recognition dawned on her.

“Oh my, god, Jesse? That’s really you isn’t it? Wait, you’ve been using magic to change your appearance haven’t you? I mean, fuck, of course you have, there’s literally no other explanation for it. I’m an idiot, I should have realized that the first night.” She pulled me into a tight hug, which I certainly didn’t reciprocate, but found myself unable to pull away from as I hung limply. “What’s wrong? Is it that existential crisis? Want to go somewhere and be alone just the two of us so I can help you feel better?” She backed away, and reached out to stroke my cheek; I flinched, and stepped backward.

“Wh-what the fuck is wrong with you Olivia? How can you just act like this after everything you’ve done to me?” I was barely able to choke out my retort through hiccuping sobs.

“Wait, what do you mean? What did I do?” She suddenly looked mortified, eyes fixed in place, mouth agape and frozen in guilt. But I had no interest in playing into that act of hers.

“Don’t give me that crap. I know you’re cheating on me. I know you’re seeing some girl.” I spat.

“I -- what? I promise you there’s nobody else, not besides you.” She was tearing up too now, seemingly shocked that I’d even accuse her of that.

“D-Don’t you dare lie to me.” My voice was getting louder and shriller by the moment. “I fucking heard you. I heard you yesterday on the phone with Trish just after I woke up. I heard you talking about leaving him to be with her. And Dylan heard you literally at this party, bragging to everyone about your girlfriend and denying that you have a boyfriend.” As I finished, Olivia just looked at me in stunned confusion.

“W-wait, what? I mean, yeah. Yeah I have a girlfriend, she’s you. You’re not seriously still in denial about being a woman, are you? After everything you told me?” Her hurt seemed to be evaporating by the moment and replaced by bewilderment.

“What do you mean, everything I told you? I haven’t spoken to you all day. And yes, yes I am a woman. But I only realized that like, three or four hours ago, so there’s no way you could know that, since the only other person who knew was Dylan, and he didn’t tell you.” For a moment I almost felt triumphant, I’d completely eviscerated her shitty excuse like it was tissue paper.

“I -- You -- you literally. Oh my god.” Her eyes widened as realization dawned on her. “The fucking blackout. You told me you remembered the important parts from Friday night.” She put her palm to her forehead in frustration.

“What are you talking about?” Something about the amount of sincerity radiating off her was disarming.

“After we left that party, you kept telling me we needed to talk. So we did. We found a nice private place, and you told me about how you desperately wanted to be a girl. We had a heart to heart, agreed you were trans, and then went on with our night. And you, god dammit. You forgot all of that, didn't you? Fuck, I’m such an idiot for not realizing,” she sighed. For my part, I could only stare at her in stunned silence.

“Wait, really?” Olivia answered me with a silent nod. “Well, fuck. I actually forgot literally realizing I was trans?”

“You kinda had a rough night after. I tried to keep you from drinking too heavily, but you were really struggling to come to terms with everything and kept sneaking in drinks all night. I should have done a better job keeping you under control. I meant to talk to you more about it yesterday, but honestly, I thought you already had it all figured out, given everything you were doing and the mood you were in.” Things were making more and more sense, and the more she told me, the more faint memories began to stir.

“Yeah, I um, that kind of rings a bell actually. Pretty crazy coincidence, right?” I admitted.

“Wait, what coincidence?” It was at that point I realized Olivia didn’t actually know the reason I’d had Dylan do wizard shit to me to begin with. So I told her. I told her everything from my dazed morning, my accidental eavesdropping, my plan, the magic, the changes and my reactions to them, and finally my more recent heart-to-heart with Dylan and eventual self-discovery. Olivia looked on silently, occasionally asking clarifying questions or giving me a look that suggested she thought I was out of my mind. When I finally finished, there was silence for several moments, before Olivia broke it. “So wait, you only even got this body because, when you came to believe I was cheating on you with a woman, your first and only reaction was to feminize yourself?”

“Well, uh, yeah when you put it that way it sounds worse than it is.” I looked at the ground tracing my foot in little circles. Olivia rubbed her temples, then pinched the bridge of her nose in exasperation.

“Babe, listen, you’re great. Honestly, you’re a wonderful girlfriend but, fuck, sometimes you can be really dumb.” I tried hard to argue with her, opening and closing my mouth several times in a futile attempt to come up with a response as I reached my hand into the air to grasp at nothing, I couldn’t deny it. She was right, after all.

“That’s fair.” I huffed, slumping forward as Olivia gently caught me in her arms. “By the way, um. I go by Abigail now.”

“Cute,” Olivia cooed as she gently tickled my belly, sending me into a fit of giggles all while I tried to control the very visible blush spreading across my cheeks.

“Be nice to me.” I bowed my head, covering my face in my hands as my lips formed a little pout.

“How is this not being nice, Abigail? I’m calling my very cute, very pretty girlfriend exactly what she is.” This woman, absolutely merciless, the audacity.

“I’m fragile.” I held the last syllable for a while as my tone dipped low and pouty.

“I can see that; you’ll be fun later tonight when we take your body for a test run, I can already tell.” Olivia’s smirk only widened as I found myself blushing all the way down to my neck. “What a pretty shade of red! I think I’d like a dress that color.”

“I call time-out.” I pulled away and crossed my arms, turning my gaze away from her. She leaned forward and lightly kissed me on the cheek, causing my knees to wobble a little. Luckily just then I was saved by Dylan, who suddenly filled the doorway, scowling at Olivia. He was suddenly owed quite the explanation, which we were happy to provide. A few minutes later he was leaning against the side of the house, scratching his chin contemplatively.

“Okay. Yeah, uh, well that definitely fills in some gaps. And sorry, dude, I’m with Olivia on this one; you and I were both kind of dumbasses.” That had to be the betrayal of the century right there. Et tu, Dylan?  “By the way, did you bring the pills?” And with that, my mood, which had been buoying upward, was immediately grasped by some shadowy tentacle and dragged into the depths of the Shitty-Feelings Sea once again.

“I lost them,” I whimpered, hanging my head in earnest this time as new tears began to collect. “Dylan, please. I’ll do whatever you want, just please find a way to keep me from losing this body.”

“Hey, hey, hey. Abigail, stop. It’s fine. I said good news, didn’t I? I mean, I also said bring the pills, but it’s not a big deal. You’re not going to lose that body.” He laid a hand on my shoulder, and I slowly tilted my head up to look at him, lip still quivering.

“I’m not?” Part of me didn’t believe it, felt like there was no way luck would be on my side this time. Why would I get the easy way instead of -- I shuddered at the thought of the alternative, of going back.

“No, look, fuck, I’m sorry. We could have figured this out way sooner if I’d paid more attention in class, but I fucked up the translation. The medicine isn’t supposed to give you your ‘typical’ shape, but your preferred one.” He was speaking very quickly, seemingly in a hurry to quiet my doubts.

“Wait, so like, it could have given me any body I wanted?” I asked.

“Not exactly; for one, you can’t actually control what happens to your body. The translation to ‘preferred’ still isn’t perfect, but we don’t really have a word for it in English. Either way, basically the spell is meant to give people a body that matches what we consider their ‘internal self,’ if that makes sense.” Dylan definitely was making sense, I could already tell where this was going.

“Yeah, and for me, my ‘internal self’--”

“Is a girl!” he exclaimed a little too enthusiastically, practically fist pumping. “I wanted the pills to test if you even needed to keep taking them in the first place to keep changing. But I know for a fact that, worst case scenario, you’re just going to be as you are right now until we can get you some more pills, because your body isn’t fighting the changes even a little.” As he finished, there seemed to be a collective sigh of relief from all three of us.

“Well, shit. I guess things really did work out, after all.” I breathed a sigh of relief. And, with impeccable comedic timing Dylan awkwardly cleared his throat.

“Uh, actually, well, there is one problem,” Dylan said, wincing. “It’s not a huge one, but--”

“What is it?” The apprehension already palpable in my wavering voice.

“Well, there might be a tiny side effect. Nothing major, but from the research I did I’ve found that people who have experienced similarly major changes like this tend to get really well, um. Just maybe buy some anti-itch cream? The rash will probably start in the next couple days, then likely subside by next Thursday.” Dylan awkwardly brought his hand up to scratch the back of his head as he offered a sheepish shrug. “Sorry I uh, only learned this was a common thing today. Otherwise I would have warned you. They don’t put warning labels like that in old grimoires. Look on the bright side, you could have wound up like half frog or something!”

“Just be glad that some weird rash is 100% worth it, cause otherwise I’d find some way to kick your ass right about now,” I mumbled, then giggled a little. With that moment of levity, the other two joined in as we broke into fits of laughter.

“So, uh, well, party?” Dylan asked, gesturing back into the house. Olivia and I looked to one another, shared a glance, some mutual shrugs and silent correspondence, then turned back to face Dylan, speaking simultaneously.

“Sure.”

Epilogue

As I downed my third beer of the night, I had to admit, I may have neglected to consider that losing a significant amount of mass would impact my alcohol tolerance. By the time I’d finished my fourth I didn’t care anymore, I might not have known what my limit was anymore, but I certainly knew what it felt like, and I had a while to go. Besides, I had my amazing girlfriend and best friend looking after me and frankly, after everything I’d been through the past couple days, I needed to cut loose and celebrate. Not only that, but the more of a drunken fool I became, the more I got to just oh so casually, oh so nonchalantly use my girlfriend as a human pillow. And, well, yeah I could probably do that either way, but this way she would feel more inclined to dote on me, my evil plan was foolproof.

Also, damn, lounging on Olivia’s lap was really nice. Just like before, my further diminished size made me fit even more neatly into her embrace. And I very quickly decided that, no matter what happened with the remainder of Dylan’s spell, I’d like the body I finally settled on to be a bit smaller than Olivia was. It was right around the time I came to that conclusion, that Olivia caught me gazing wistfully up at her. She grinned at me, and ran a hair through my hair, causing me to shudder with happiness at the feeling of her hands running through soft, silky hair.

“What’s that look for?” She asked.

“Just happy,” I slurred, gripping her tightly, “you’re a good girlfriend. Sorry I doubted you.”

“Well, I think I can forgive you considering that big puppy dog look on your face, besides, I suppose you can’t control the fact that you’re a bit of a dumbass.” She lightly pinched my cheek and bopped my nose as I turned away, crossing my arms.

“No fair, I was confused, figuring out gender stuff is hard.” I whined.

“Babe come on, anyone with two eyes can clearly see you’re much better off being a girl, it was obvious. But that’s okay, what you lack in brains you make up for in hotness.” There Olivia went making me all blushy again. Honestly, how dare she. I was gearing up for another round of pouting when she pulled me in for a long, deep kiss that may or may not have made me forget how to breath. Unfortunately the kiss ended in my needing to suddenly gasp and sputter for air as my heart worked itself into overdrive. And I thought being smiled at by a pretty girl was bad enough.

The night progressed in the way that smaller college parties do, with drinking games, music, people coming and going through the night. As things progressed, and I became more and more clearly comfortable with myself and my situation, Dylan slowly gave up any and all pretense of being the responsible wizard friend concerned about the effects his magic had on me, and fully embraced the drunken meathead fratboy himbo I knew him best as. Soon enough he’d had enough drinks in him to start showing off, and made a show of bench-pressing three party goers at once. Not to be outdone, and also too drunk to rationalize that I was already weaker than him before I lost considerable mass, I attempted and failed to keep up. At the very least I could manage Olivia, who seemed to appreciate the gesture, lounging in the air and bragging about having a hot buff girlfriend at her beck and call. Unfortunately, as her compliments continued I wound up too flustered to continue and nearly dropped her.

As the night began to wind down, Olivia tried her best to keep me upright and clear headed, unfortunately for her I’d once again been sneaking drinks all night. This time though not because I was bummed out, but because I needed to celebrate. I finally had myself figured out, and also just so happened to be at the very beginning of an entire week off from class, of course I was going to drink myself stupid. Making dumb, shortsighted, but fun decisions like that was an important part of the college experience, or at the very least, had become an important part of mine.

Eventually we, or more accurately, Olivia decided it was time to head home and sleep. She proceeded to guide my shambling, stumbling form back to my place in a manner which must have been very reminiscent of only days ago. Only this time, instead of pouting or otherwise being down on myself as I surely had been that night, I was a little ball of giggling, drunken revelry. Much more pleasant to be around, but also way harder to keep a handle on. Olivia was in the middle of convincing me for likely the fourth or fifth time since we left that, no, we weren’t going to go find another party because it was bedtime, when we finally arrived home. She guided me down the stairs to my room, and settled me on the bed, before running upstairs to get me snacks and water to help sober me up a bit.

The rest of the night was a bit of a blur, but I was finishing up a midnight snack of bread and fruit with a side of several glasses of water, when Olivia plopped down next to me, and put her arms around me. I nestled into her, and at that point my brain helpfully pointed out that I still had a lot to get used to when it came to my body.

“Hey, babe?” My mouth wasn’t doing a spectacular job at forming words, but it seemed I was intelligible, if only just barely.

“What is it, Abbi?”

“Will you teach me how to be a girl?” I looked into her eyes and gave my best approximation of a wide eyed, pleading stare. Olivia rolled her eyes and ruffled my hair.

“Yes, sweetie, I’ll help you. What do you need to know?”

“How do I pee now?” It seemed like that question was enough to break Olivia, as she collapsed into a fit of giggles.

“Sweetie, I haven’t really confirmed, but, don't you still have your penis?” She awkwardly gestured to my crotch.

“Yeah, I do.” I nodded matter-of-factly, then continued to stare expectantly at her.

“Then I’m pretty sure it’s the same.” She laid her hand on my leg lightly, and squeezed affectionately.

“But, I a girl now? Don’t I have to do it differently?” I asked

“If you want you can sit down?” She offered with a tiny shrug.

“Okay.” I shambled off to the bathroom, about a minute later, Olivia was sent into another fit of laughter when she heard me call out to her “Which way am I supposed to wipe it?”

With those needs taken care of, I settled back into bed with her, it was around then that I remembered I was in private with my girlfriend in a body I was very eager to discover more about. I could remember awkwardly kissing her, trying and failing to pull myself on top of her, and then ultimately being told to lay back while she got things started for us. The commanding tone in her voice was enough to melt me, and I’d quickly done as she asked, no need to be told twice. After that, things grew fuzzier, but we definitely had sex, and it was definitely very good sex. In all honestly, it was probably the first time I could call any sex I’d had very good.

That was how I found myself, still lying in bed at noon, with a splitting headache and a fuzzy, but mostly complete picture of the previous night's events, and desperately trying to protect my delicate little ears from the sound of my asshole neighbor using what sounded like a leaf blower. Honest, doing yard work twice in two days, didn’t these people know they lived in a college town? I had half a mind to convince Dylan to curse him with some kind of ultra-fast growing grass spell, but then realized that would only exacerbate my problem. Also it was probably illegal, dang wizard laws. I decided not to wait around for my alarm this time around, and dragged myself out of bed.

In a familiar ritual, dragged myself across the tile floor all while nursing my headache and trying to piece together the night before, arrived in the bathroom, flicked on the fluorescent lights, and caught my reflection in the mirror. A wide smile spread across my face. I’d definitely changed some more overnight, I looked a little shorter, my features slightly more delicate, my muscles actually looking a bit bigger, but that was likely the reduction in overall size. Whether or not the pills’ effects were going to continue all the way through to my ideal form, I didn’t know, but at the very least it seemed they had at least a little more juice in them. And the result was wonderful, I glided off to the shower, thoughts awash with possibilities. I definitely needed to get some more clothes that showed off my arms, cause damn they were hot, plus I needed to settle on a hairstyle, even if that was just letting it continue to grow out. Then there was the matter of my skin, it was so smooth and supple, it would probably be a good idea to get some products to keep that up, Olivia could probably help me with that.

Despite my hungover state, I really was able to find the energy to absolutely luxuriate in the sensation of the hot water hitting my wonderful new body. I took the time to appreciate every curve, every bit of soft, silky, hairless skin, every new fascinating little detail that had come since the night before. I emerged refreshed, but still in need of some additional help to return to full function. I downed some ibuprofen, dressed myself in a nice sundress, and ascended the stairs.

In the kitchen, Olivia greeted me with a chipper smile as she tended to a sizzling pan of eggs, potatoes and breakfast sausage. “Hey you! Heard the shower run so I figured I’d get us started on breakfast, how are you feeling this morning? Have a clear picture of last night?”

“I think so, yeah. Maybe a bit fuzzy, but there aren’t any big chunks missing. We cleared up our misunderstanding, cut loose a little at that kickback, then headed home for some intimacy, did I miss anything huge?” I hugged her behind, and kissed her neck gratefully as I inhaled the smell of greasy food, which, somehow, always seemed to hit the spot when I was hungover.

“That’s about right. As long as you’re still aware that you are in fact a girl now.” She lightly nipped my nose and flashed a teasing smile. I rolled my eyes.

“Yes, I know. I didn’t forget twice.”

“Forgetting once is bad enough, Abbi.” She gave my butt a playful smack, then shooed me away as she dished the food out onto two plates, we settled at the table and ate. After a satisfying meal, we retired to the sofa, and I reclined in her arms, once again taking a moment to appreciate my diminishing height.

“So, I’m a little foggy on the details last night, but, was I any good?” I asked sheepishly.

“You were sloppy, but if nothing else, eager to please. You kept trying to show off, and were really intent on showing me how strong you were. Which I mean, that was cute since you’ve clearly actually gotten less strong since the changes.” She giggled, and ran her hand along my arm.

“ I dunno, I guess I’m just comfortable in my own skin now so I feel more proud of them,” I stammered.

“I know, it makes me happy to see that too, it was just funny is all. But no, you were very sweet last night. Honestly though, I’ve gotta say, with guys getting topped is pretty fun, but with girls? I think I like having a sweet, yielding girlfriend who will let me take control in bed.” She was speaking with this husky, breathy voice that made me want to just come right apart for her. But, at the same time, a little alarm bell was going off in my head. Was there a problem? Had I been too controlling last night? She said I was eager and trying to show off a bunch, maybe I kept trying to pin her down or make her act more submissive.

It kind of made sense, I’d spent so much time pretending to be some man’s man that I probably picked up on some of that, right? That sort of prideful expectation to dominate, to control. Plus before I’d definitely always taken the lead with her as a guy, so she was probably alluding to that and trying to get me to change how I acted in bed. Hopefully I hadn’t made her uncomfortable, I’d hate for her to see me that way, I’d much prefer to be her sweet, yielding girlfriend than ruin her enjoyment of sex by being really sexually aggressive.

I wound up getting a little too caught up in that thought process, unable to get it out of my head. Lucky me I had options. Shortly after it came time for me to get started with my day, and we departed for the time being while I finished getting ready. Fully dressed and functional, I left a little early for my Monday workout session with Dylan, and headed directly to his frat house instead of the gym. I did, afterall, need to talk to him in private about a certain matter.

* * *

The room to Dylan’s door burst open, interrupting his pre-exercise stretches, he stood with a start, I marched in with purpose.

“Dylan! I need another favor!” Apparently my interruption was a bit too jarring, It took him several moments to fully process everything. He did get always pretty engrossed in his stretches, after all.

“What? Abbi why are you? -- nevermind -- you need another favor, this isn’t more magic is it?” He grumbled.

“Look just a little bit okay? I had a talk with Olivia and I think I made her uncomfortable last night. And, maybe she’d be happier in this relationship if maybe you had like a spell that could uh,” I trailed off, blushing profusely at what I was about to ask, “well like, do you think you could make me more submissive?” In the stunned silence that followed, Dylan awkwardly lifted his phone from his pocket, and tapped the dial button, holding it to his ear he waited for a few moments.

“Hey, Olivia? -- Yeah, yeah I got your text. -- Uh-huh, she’s here. -- Yup, she asked me to -- Yup, that, exactly that. -- Okay, I’ll tell her.” He hung up the phone.

“What is it?” I asked, bewildered at the scene that just unfolded before me. Dylan grinned.

“Your girlfriend wants me to tell you that you are completely clueless, but she loves you anyway.”