Wales

Follow Up From Other Day

Added 2025-12-05 23:10:03 +0000 UTC

As a heads up, I'm talking something unpleasant here. Unsure how many need a trigger warning but that's what this is.

So, the other day, I said I needed a small break to process/handle the death of a close family member. This was my uncle, my mother's brother. Any death is tragic and sad no matter what. What makes this one especially harder was that he killed himself. And even harder than that was how premeditated it all was. I'll spare details but its been hard to handle. Especially Wednesday when we did a viewing and I was one of the two final witnesses before his cremation.

As for how I'm doing, I've felt numb and unsure what to feel. There were good memories with my uncle growing up. Fun things and activities done with him. But as I got older, things got worse. He always had an issue with drinking and also unchecked bipolar disorder. The best way to describe what life was like with him at his worst is this scene from Whiplash. Everything is okay and pleasant before he starts throwing, yelling, and calling you a cunt.

It leaves me conflicted. I'm sad he is gone as there's a lot I'd want to say and process. I've been doing my best to be strong for my mom as she's been taking it hard. The grief comes and goes since she had similar issues with her brother. But its still difficult for her.

I'm not gonna go on with the good and bad with him. I just wanted to put something down, put my thoughts out there, and sort of keep people in the loop.