Sneak Peek - Superstition S3 (2)

One for the Chrismancers. You ready for that lock-in or naw?

* * *

“Oh, friend,” I laugh, “is that what we are now?” He stiffens but then relaxes a moment later, settling down on the workout machine’s seat.

“I don’t think we’ll ever not be friends, $name. And honestly, I’d rather be that first than anything else.” I raise a brow, but he doesn’t go back and change his wording or even look like he regrets his previous words.

“I don’t know what to think of that, Chris.”

He laughs, taking my hands in his and pulling me closer so that I was now standing between his legs. He centers his attention on my hands, running his fingers along my skin and then closing his eyes as if committing the feel to memory.

“I missed you so much,” he finally meets my eyes, and I find them full of adoration and even hurt, “I don’t even think words can explain how much. The only way I went on was telling myself that you were strong, and if anyone could get through this shit, it was you.” He tugs me forward, and I stumble, but he catches me. I chuckle at that; he always does. He buries his face in my stomach and squeezes my waist.

“You don’t know how many times I’ve dreamed of holding you at night and how many times I had to wake up and realize you weren’t there,” he whispers, “I just wanted to stay asleep most days cos at least you were there.”

“Well, I’m here now,” I chuckle, and he pulls back. I notice that his eyes are watery.

<<if $gender is "female">>\

“I’m serious, $name. I knew how I felt about you, but I didn’t think it was that bad. I felt like I had lost a part of myself, my second half. And it’s corny as fuck, but that’s the only way to say it. I swear I didn’t believe in that soulmate bullshit until you came into my life. And I …” he glances away, trying to steady his breath and find the right words, “and you need to tell me that I’m not the only one.”

“You’re -,” I start, but he silences me by squeezing my waist and shaking his head.

<<else>>\

“I’m serious, $name,” he glances away and shakes his head, falling back in his seat but never taking his hands off my waist, “when we became friends, that was it. We were friends, and it was never going to become more than that. And then you literally …” He looks over at me, and it just looks like he deflates from pure fondness. “I don’t even know how to say it. You became the one person that meant the world to me. A $gender. In the past, I’d just laugh and shoo it away and say ‘no homo.’ But I’d be damned if I wouldn’t do anything for you. You changed my entire life, and I can never thank you enough or voice how much you mean to me and how much I’m grateful for that. But I’m going to try as long as you let me, and I just need you to tell me that I can.”

“You -,” I start, but he silences me by squeezing my waist and shaking his head.

<</if>>\

“No. I need you to tell me that this is it. That this is where we stop all of this.” I try to move out of his hands, but he doesn’t let me, bowing his head as he lets out a nervous laugh.

“Okay, no, that came out all wrong. I didn’t hear myself until I said it.” His head falls to the side as he continues laughing, “oh, wow. No, don’t do that. I mean, tell me that we’re done with the games. We’re done with whatever we’ve had going on this entire time …” he chokes on his words and stops to take a breath. “Tell me that you’re mine. And I’m yours, and that’s the end of it … I love you, $name. And I don’t want to go another day thinking that the end can come and that you don’t know that or I haven’t expressed it enough.” He leans in and squeezes my hands.